we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
where are my eyebrows?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
