There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
