He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
