I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I deserve this hangover.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
