I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
