gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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