i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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