Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
