3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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