love makes seman taste better
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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