The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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