I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize