Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
