It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
