doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
