If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
It's official drugs can't kill me
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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