who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
