I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I think my vagina is haunted
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
So many bounce houses so little time
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
