She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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