So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
