No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
