I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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