I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
