You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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