she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
