I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I need help removing her.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
