Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
