Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
