the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
