Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
