I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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