I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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