You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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