He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
it's like iHOP with fire
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize