I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
