I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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