it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
