NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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