i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
