Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
