Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
