i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
