Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize