can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize