Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
