It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I can't turn off my feet"
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Randomize
