We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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