are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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