I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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