ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
