I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize