what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
