No stitches, just platelets and will power
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize